Defining Sexual Sobriety

As a fellowship, we have found that for us sexual sobriety means no sex with self, no pornography and no sex with anyone other than our wives. For those of us who are single, sexual sobriety means abstaining from sex in any form. Our own futile attempts to control our addiction and our own enlightened self-interest has forced us to this conclusion. This commitment to sobriety has helped to lead us to a freedom and intimacy we could otherwise never know.

Confidentiality Statement

Living Without Lust upholds the highest ethical standards of confidentiality so as to ensure emotional safety and anonymity. Only in situations involving abuse to children or the elderly, in cases where there is a suicidal or homicidal intent, or when legally required by a court to do so will confidentiality be broken. If you have plans to harm yourself or others, you should NOT use this service. Instead, you should immediately call 911 and seek appropriate professional help.

Disclaimer Statement

“Any posted comments by visitors to this site do not necessarily reflect the views of any ministry partners, volunteers, employees or employers of Living Without Lust. We possess no business relationship with any outside organization and waive any liability that may arise from participating in such groups. We provide support, suggestions and resources. We provide training for leaders, but do not promote our site as professional counseling. We are neither responsible not liable for your life or any continued problems you may experience in relation to what we have or have not provided.”

Our Values

  1. To be kind and compassionate to everyone at all times.
  2. To treat everyone with respect.
  3. To listen to other people’s stories.
  4. To engage with others who agree with our mission and with other sexual addiction ministries, both to give and receive.
  5. To provide helpful resources wherever possible.
  6. To grow in our understanding of the problem and the solution.
  7. To tailor our ministry to needs as they arise without pre-conceived expectations.
  8. To work as a team and build communities of recovery wherever possible. We cannot do this alone.
  9. To attempt to communicate respectfully without using profanity or using sexually abusive or overly graphic language.
  10. To seek to honor God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, in all we do and say.


James 5:16

Executive Director

Jay Haug graduated from Williams College in 1973 with a B.A. in American Civilization and from Virginia Theological Seminary in 1977 with a Master of Divinity. In addition, Jay earned a post-graduate Diploma in Theology from the University of Nottingham, England and a Diploma in Pastoral Studies from St. John’s College Nottingham, where he worked with Dr. Frank Lake at Lingdale Counseling Center. He has worked as an Episcopal priest, a financial advisor and as a radio talk show host. He has been active in the sexual addiction recovery movement for 25 years. Jay lives in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida with Claudia his wife of 43 years. They have three children and five grandchildren. He is the author of The Rest of God: Finding Freedom From Lust in the Internet Age, Speaking to the Addictive Personality in the Local Congregation: A Guide for Pastors and Preachers and a previous book of poetry on recovery themes called Beyond the Flaming Sword.

Living Without Lust Board

The Living Without Lust Board consists of a group of men who seek to demonstrate a commitment to personal sexual sobriety and spiritual growth. As men who are overcoming lust one day at a time, we now desire to use our unique spiritual gifts and talents to help men who struggle as we do and to seek opportunities to reach clergy, Christian leaders, churches and other ministries with the hope we have found in the gospel. Come join us!

Statement of Faith

We believe the Bible to be the inspired and the only infallible, authoritative Word of God (2 Timothy 3:16).

  1. We believe that there is one God, eternally existent in three persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit (Matthew 28:19).
  2. We believe in
    1. the full deity and full humanity of Christ (John 1:1–14; Hebrews 1:3–5, 2:5–18),
    2. His virgin birth (Luke 1:26–38),
    3. His sinless life (2 Corinthians 5:21; Hebrews 4:15),
    4. His miracles (John 10:31–38),
    5. His vicarious and atoning death through His shed blood (Matthew 26:28; 1 Peter 2:24),
    6. His bodily resurrection (John 20:1–31; Acts 1:1–3; 1 Corinthians 15:1–8),
    7. His ascension to the right Hand of the Father (Acts 1:4–11),
    8. His present rule as Head of the Church (Ephesians 1:22, 5:23; Colossians 1:18), and
    9. His personal return in power and glory (Revelation 19:11–16; 22:7–21).
  3. We believe in the present ministry of the Holy Spirit, by whose indwelling the Christian is enabled to live a godly life (2 Corinthians 3:17–18).
  4. We believe that regeneration by the Holy Spirit is absolutely essential for the salvation of all who are separated from God by sin and rebellion (John 14:15–21; Romans 8:1–11; 1 Corinthians 12:3).
  5. We believe in the resurrection of both the saved and the lost: they that are lost unto damnation (Matthew 25:41–46), and they that are saved unto the resurrection of eternal life (Matthew 25:31–40; 1 Corinthians 15:42–57).
  6. We believe in the spiritual unity of believers in our Lord Jesus Christ, with equality across races, genders, and classes (Colossians 3:11).